Morning Puck: Kane is Able

The Rangers have reverted to pre-cap days and can’t seem to buy a win. They lose 1-0 for the second game in a row, despite big offseason offensive signings. Gomez continues to suck it.

Kovalchuk dangles to victory. Lowly Atlanta gets a shootout win over the increasingly lowly Leaves. Kovalchuk won it on a move that made Toskala look silly. At the other end, Hedberg basically tackled Sundin to prevent him scoring on a previous try. It was funny to watch.

Rookie Patrick Kane gathers four points in a loss to the BJs. Eleven goals are scored and the blowjobs take a 7-4 win over Chicago.

Sucks to the Ducks. St. Louis continues to show life as they beat the champs 4-2. Where’s your Niedermessiah now?

Crybaby Smyth returns to Edmonton and the Avs win. Oh, what an emotional night. Not a dry eye in the oil patch… bullshit. Colorado won 4-2 by adding an empty netter. Now everyone hates Ryan Smyth.

Just when you thought they had no goaltending, LA get a shutout win. Of course, LaBarbera only had to stop 17 shots and his team put up six goals to beat the crap out of Nashville. But it’s a goose egg nonetheless.

As for the above image? It’s Cain and Abel of course. Read your Bible, heathens.

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4 Comments

  1. I was thinking Tarzan and Jane. Edgar Rice Burroughs is my own personal Jesus.

  2. That must be a misprint. It’s not possible for the Rangers to lose.

  3. And I’m sure Gomez will decide to play well tomorrow. It will be fucking perfect.

  4. Where’s your Niedermessiah now?

    apparently retiring. or not. you never know. god, i want him back on the squad.


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