Dominik Hasek Will Flip You. He’ll Flip Ya For Real

Fred Fenster

During the Detroit Red Wings total dismantling of the Minnesota Wild Friday night by an ass-whooping score of 5-0, Dominik Hasek came way out of his crease late in the third period on a breakaway by Marian Gaborik and completely upended the Slovak by sliding sideways into him and taking out his legs. Was it a dirty play in a game the Red Wings had completely in hand? Possibly. Hasek was called for a tripping minor but some would argue that The Dominator should have been assessed a match penalty for intent to injure on the play. Decide for yourself, after the jump:

Pretty gnarly, wouldn’t you say? Gaborik came pretty close to landing right on his head. Last I heard, a broken neck ain’t a particularly good thing, so Gabby should consider himself very lucky (and Hasek should as well, to a certain extent). Since we here at MYFO deal in conspiracy, conjecture and some other word that begins with a “c” (take your pick), here’s our take on the play: it was racially motivated.

Here’s how it breaks down:

  1. Dominik Hasek is a Czech

  2. Marian Gaborik is a Slovak

  3. Czechs don’t particularily like Slovaks since their countries split in 1993 (possibly – I didn’t waste my time looking it up)
  4. Dominik Hasek will not stop his reign of terror until every Slovakian player is out of the NHL

I choose to refer to this as Hasek’s “Master Plan”. A league-wide ethnic cleansing, if you will. Between this instance and when Hasek threw his blocker at naturalized Slovak Peter Bondra after they collided in the 1998 Eastern Conference Finals, the ugly truth is abundantly clear. I know the old adage “two’s a coincidence and three’s a trend” but screw that. Wait until Hasek breaks his stick over Marian Hossa’s head and see who’s laughing then. No Slovakians will be giggling, I’ll tell you that much.

Maybe I’m wrong on this one. Perhaps Marc Crawford ordered the hit on this play as well. That’s always a possibility as I suppose there’s a good chance that Crawford believed Gabby had to pay as well.

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7 Comments

  1. I love the Detroit announcers: “What was Hasek supposed to do?” Um, not almost kill the guy? Ah, homers!

  2. Hasek’s been doing this shit for the better part of a decade. It wasn’t even cool when he did it for the team I root for.

  3. Was it the one about the hooker with dysentery? I swear , she never mentioned money until I came.

  4. Nice save. What’s all the fuss?

  5. Uhm, were they playing “I believe I can fly” in the background?

  6. Let the boys play…It’s is hockey, not golf, people get knocked down. I didn’t think it was a even a penalty.

  7. Why is it a penalty? the goalie can play the puck, no?
    Hockey 101 – get your head up!


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