Random Internet Blog Trade Rumors of the Week: A Whale of a Deal

Nobody said Eklund was a manThis is the kickoff of a new (and hopefully weekly) MYFO feature: the Random Internet Blog Trade Rumor of the Week. We at MYFO scour the hockey Ebays (or Eb’ehs, as they say up North) for the ridiculous, the preposterous, and the merely ignorant trade proposals floating around out there.

First up this week: Rumblings out of Tampa regarding the Lightning’s potential desire to trade Martin St. Louis. Any deal involving St. Louis, one of the top ten scoring threats in the league, would have to be a blockbuster, right? Tampa could re-stock their roster with 2 or 3 NHL-caliber players, or land a truly elite prospect or two. St. Louis is 32, and had a 100-point season in 2006-07, and makes a little over $5 million. A contender looking for the final piece of the puzzle, or a wealthy team looking to spark a turnaround (cough-Montreal-cough) would be thrilled to land St. Louis, I’d think.

Instead, reports have him being pursued heavily by Dallas, which is dangling…Marty Turco? Whaa? The whale-fucker? I can’t believe any sane Lightning fan would want that deal. So I checked around to see what Lightning blogs were saying about the rumor…only to find that there are apparently no active Lightning blogs. I have a feeling that Tampa ownership was throwing this out there to get a reaction from the fanbase. Mission failed, disastrously.

RIBT Rumor Number Two is actually an entire rumorsphere surrounding the Ducks. With Scott Niedermayer’s decision to play a little hockey again, the Ducks are in a bit of cap trouble for both this season and 2008-09. And if Teemu Selanne comes back, look out. In order to accommodate these two waffling geezers, the Ducks are going to have to ship out at least one hefty contract (i.e., Mathieu Schneider) and maybe two (Todd Marchant and/or Francois Beauchemin). Hey, nothing like dealing from desperation to start the ridiculous rumors flying!

I’d never heard of this site, but Girl with a Puck is a good name for a blog. Plus, chicks who dig hockey are cool by me. She proposes that Schneider could be moved for “some kind of miracle goalscorer.” That sounds like a bid for the Ducks to acquire Hockey Jesus. Hmmm, Schneider for Crosby, straight up? Doubtful. Now, if the Pens threw in another player, maybe. Sound completely ridiculous? Well, Eklund thinks there might be something to it, so it almost has to be sort of loosely connected to something that might possibly involve an event that could actually happen.

Heard any stupid prattlings out there? Share them with MYFO: MeltYourFaceOff@gmail.com.

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11 Comments

  1. If St. Louis gets traded to the Blues, Gary Bettman’s head will implode.

    Make it so.

  2. Brad Richards for sale! Recently rebuilt Like new!

  3. Hi, MYFO. :) coupla’ things.

    1. thanks for mentioning me & that my blogname is cool. haha…

    2. TB does have a few blogs, but not necessarily hyper-dedicated to anaylsis and the like (Bolts Mag, Bolts Blog, and the Tampa Bay.com’s official MSM blog, Lightning Strikes). In Lightning Strikes, that whole Marty St. Pierre for Marty Turco thing was addressed and ruled a joke of sorts….

    “The coach had spent the past few minutes telling reporters what he thought of the recent trade rumor that had the Lightning sending St. Louis to the Stars for goalie Marty Turco; “It’s absolute (B.S.).”

    As Tortorella passed St. Louis in the locker room, he yelled out, “Marty St. Louis for Marty Turco,” and laughed.

    “That’s a great trade,” St. Louis said, “… for Dallas.”

    Tortorella knows the rumors always will be out there, and that there is a belief the team will have to part with one of its stars to perhaps fill other needs. But Tortorella said trading either St. Louis, Vinny Lecavalier or Brad Richards doesn’t make sense.”

    Lightning Strikes, Damian Cristadero

    3. My best guess on who’s taking the fall for Scotty’s return is Todd Marchant… packaged w/ someone else… or Schneider alone. I’m not so sure about bringing in a ‘miracle goalscorer’ anymore mainly because I think the concern is eliminating the cap issue. The goals may come in by bringing in a couple of kids off the farm. Who knows…

    4. IF… IF IF IF IF Teemu were to return, the OC Register‘s sportswriter Randy Youngman seems to believe there won’t be cap issues…

    “Would the Ducks also have salary-cap problems if Selanne returns? Not necessarily, because he technically is an unsigned free agent and likely wouldn’t make any outrageous demands.”

    –Randy Youngma, OC Register article

  4. @ Finny: Welcome aboard. However, you seem to have confused us with some other blog that does “analysis.” We mostly just make dick jokes.

    Also, by “active” Lightning blogs, I meant ones that do more than game recaps or update more than once a month. I couldn’t get Lightning Strikes to load (also, as a MSM blog, they get paid to (sort of) care about the Lightning).

  5. Wow Finny has shattered the previous record (of two paragraphs) for length of a MYFO comment. Congrats! You may have cracked the record for intelligent comments too, but that bar was pretty low. This is the home of Sean Avery cancer jokes after all. (and thank god it is)

    With the Light in town tonight, I did a Ballyhype search for Tampa blogs. The site search function laughed at me.

  6. Stop teasing us poor Lightning fans. We can’t read or write.

  7. But as a Lightning fan, your wit is electric, Reasonable.

  8. Boogie Woogie Woogie.

  9. Sorry RD, no offence. You’re too sharp to be buried on some Tampa blog. Oh sorry again.

    And you’ll be laughing right back at me when Gainey buys into your “Brad Richards – like new!” line under the weight of the French media.

  10. hahaha, no worries, I just thought I’d toss in my own thoughts… I did realize the wit, but I guess maybe I chose to ignore the warning signs? :) It’s all good though, I feel you on that no active TB blogs though (I wish there was one)…

  11. The best Lightning board that I’ve found is the one on Sun Sports TV Website (the local Lightning TV affiliate).

    http://www.sunsportstv.com/ubbthreads/postlist.php?Cat=&Board=frmLightning


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