Even though Tiger Woods has gotten off to a phenomenal start to his golfing season, winning the only two tournaments he has played, MYFO has learned that the sporting superstar will be shining his light on the National Hockey League, at least for a few weeks. Tiger Woods is the new backup goaltender for the St. Louis Blues.
How could one of the most recognizable people on the planet keep his budding two-sport status secret until now? Easy: He has been honing his craft with the Peoria Rivermen of the AHL, using the pseudonym of Chris Beckford-Tseu. In Peoria, “Beckford-Tseu” has compiled a nice 15-9-2 record, with a 2.61 GAA and .900 SV%, earning him the callup.
Woods first gained an interest in playing hockey from his wife, Swedish model Elin Nordegren. Elin was reportdly a big-time women’s player back in Sweden, and turned Tiger on to the sport.
Tiger’s new teammates were happy to have him aboard. “I’m all for it,” said recently appointed Blues captain Eric Brewer. “He said he can get us some great tee times at Pebble Beach in April or May, after we miss the playoffs.”
Blues President John Davidson said the time was right to call up Woods. “We’ve been having a bit of trouble selling tickets to Tuesday games. I am happy to announce that, for the rest of the season, Tiger will be our starting goaltender on Tuesday night home games. Also, he said he would give me some tips on hitting out of the sand.” Head coach Andy Murray was fine with the Tuesdays arrangement. “Lord knows he can’t be worse than any of our other backups have been.”
Woods was also very excited about his new venture. “This will work out perfectly for me. The NHL regular season ends right before Masters week. I couldn’t have done this for a playoff-bound team, but the Blues are a perfect fit.”
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Melt Your Face-Off 
I need to see the teeth before I can decide how much he looks like Tiger.
I call bullshit.
He’s wearing a Reebok jersey.
I thought it was Martin Lawrence