It’s Wild Wednesday!

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MYFO, as regular readers know, is all about reader service. And dick jokes. OK, mostly dick jokes. But we also like to do favors for readers when we can. One reader recently offered to pay Weed Against Speed $1,000 if he would refrain from writing about his beloved Minnesota Wild for a month. The reader didn’t say why, but we assume it’s because Weed is just too damned harsh when it comes to ragging on the Wild players.

We don’t know if Weed can make it the entire month without writing about the Wild. Or even until tomorrow. But today, we stand with him in solidarity, and try to help out that generous reader at the same time. The MYFO gang, Weed excluded, will offer their thoughts on their favorite Wild players.

LeNoceur: I am a huge fan of Niklas Backstrom. Why? Because he’s the Wild goalie that likes Dismember, and not Rascal Flatts. Also, on days he doesn’t start he plays for the Caps. Is that even legal under the CBA? Whatever, he’s super-good and should make all Wild fans–nay, all Minnesotans–proud to be vaguely associated with him. Also, he serves as a beacon of hope for all those undrafted Europeans hoping to escape the madness of home-and-home weekend series in Bratislava.

ReasonableDoubt: I <3 Keith Carney. Carney (who doesn’t, incidentally, smell like cabbage) has been a hockey player longer than most of you have been alive. At the ripe young age of 38, has played for thirteen different teams, including two stints on the U.S. National Team. He’s played in 41 games this year, has no goals, and a +/- of 11. I have no idea what that means other than when this guy is on the ice, he’s nowhere near the goal, but he creates scoring chances. This guy was in high school in 1987. He could have actually been Bill or Ted. What more do you want?

Hextall454: Branko Radivojevic. Let’s say it together, shall we? BRAN-KOH RA-DIH-VOY-UH-VIHCH. Damn, that’s a good time. He’s a left winger with a right handed shot, which you would think makes him pretty useless along the boards in the offensive zone. (You would think correctly.) Radivojevic has the worst plus/minus on the team at -16, which is an unusual thing to see in a defensive checking forward. Nonetheless, Rads has decided to break the age-old rule of uniform numbering, “You need to have skills to be deserving of wearing a number over 60.” To date, the best player to ever wear the 92 sweater in the NHL is probably Rick Tocchet, unless you’re partial to the stylings of Jeff O’Neill. So it’s not like All-Time 92 isn’t for the taking. However, as long as Branko amasses 1 goal for every 8 games he plays, he’s probably not making a run. And that’s a guarantee Tocchet can take to the casinos.

Raskolnikov: I like Josh Harding.  Lefthanded goalies look odd to me.  He also gave up three goals against the Hawks tonight.

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3 Comments

  1. I like Kim Johnsson because we have the same birthday (March 16, hint hint.) =P

  2. Domi, I am totally sending you a card on your birthday.

  3. This is the smartest, most insightful piece yet about the Wild on this fine blog. It was funny, yet also informative, and you were somehow able to get it all done without a Seinfeld or Simpsons reference. If this kind of quality work continues, I’ll start paying for Wild articles. Please keep up the good work!


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