More Evidence That Listening to Nickelback Is Not Good for You

Mark Parrish

The Minnesota Wild’s Mark Parrish loves him some Nickelback. Really, really loves it. Too much, apparently. The self-pitying lyrics, dirge-like guitar riffs and general craptitude have Parrish in danger of losing his job.

Other than when his kid was born a couple of weeks ago, Parrish said,

It feels like I’m stuck in a rut, like I’m stuck in quicksand and can’t quite get out.

Hmm, that almost sounds like a bad song lyric.

At any rate, Jacques Lemaire has had just about enough of Parrish’s listless, depressive “rut.” In a polite, French-Canadian way, Lemaire told Parrish to stop sucking his thumb and start busting his ass.

And stop listening to fucking Nickelback already.



  1. I heard Nickelback is writing a song and dedicating it to Parrish. It’s called Healthy Scratch, because that’s what Parrish was last night.

  2. Look at this healthy scratch, every time I look it makes me laugh

  3. ok, so I clicked on the link for “the fourth period” and there was an ad for The Hockey News, which showed a picture of Sidney Crosby and the headline “Sid answers to you!” but when I first saw it, I thought it said STD instead of Sid.

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