Ovie’s Passion Part I: Fortuitous Tuesday

This iz holiest time of year. When mythologies are created, like Bob Coztaz beating Steve Sullivan in battle of heightz and Mark Messy Yay’s hairline receding faster than normal because of extra testosteroni, the Edmontoni Treat! Now, in 2008 in the year of our Bob Carpenter (A.B.C.), a new mythoz is created. Not one that makes David Jaffe creamz his pantz, but one that resuzcitatez a city!

We start in Tennessee? I no see people welcoming us wit acoustic guitars! Behold, your saviorz ride in on an ass! Brooks Laich vomited all over our luggagez, so he pull team bus into the city! That’s the last time I fermentz Concord grapes with yeast from Olie’s pubez!

PREDATORS? Excuse me, JP Dumont, do youz know whyz you here? It have something to do with ze Bacardi Razz in your hands and those thirteen year olds girlz in standz!

Power play mean I’z ready to preach the word. I iz the way to the net. Without me, zere iz only lucky deflections and fired assistant coaches!


One Timer Blocked by Vernon Fiddler

Why iz Marc Chagall in Nashville? Here some symbolism for you.

Drops pants

What does cock signify?

Alexander Semin scores.


You still no believez the word? This Nashville team, so full of left-winged doubters! Lemme use your own meanz to express my point.

Drives down left wing to the net

Iz not season for giving …

Passes behind the back to Nicklas Bäckström

But I waz never into following customz.

Backstrom shoots and scores

Still no believe? My Ted, my Ted, why does Sir Thou take so long to use SwdTech? I haz to wait 60 seconds to use Quadra Slice? Howz about’s I finish them now!!!

Procures puck

Eat yourz hearts out, Sir Charlez!!!!!

Banks puck off side boards

… Ovie time …

Puck goes in empty net while Marek Zidlicky crashes into the crossbar

Oooooh, his battle bow is broken.

Assist to Yahooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!! for the photo



  1. I think I’m ready to renounce Hockey Jesus and join the Church of Ovie. Fuck healing the blind–dragging the Caps into the playoffs after their start is a real miracle.

  2. More OVIE TIME please!

    /ovaltine, but it’s in a round jar!

  3. @Domi: We need to get that logo photoshopped.

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