You Want MYFO Swag? I Got Your MYFO Swag Right Here, Bitch


As many of you are well-aware of by now, we here at MYFO are morally bankrupt. What you may not be aware of is that we are now fiscally bankrupt as well. You see, the MYFO coffers have finally run dry and we are now forced to take action. After many late-night meetings, we have decided the best way to restock our dwindling financial resources is to allow all of you, our dear fans, to become more than just a sporadic viewer of our fine blog and actually be able to show the world that you are a devoted reader of the 202nd most popular blog on the interwebs!

After the jump, check out the first in what will be many editions of MYFO swag!

Have a drinking problem? Not yet? Want one? Well, liquor of any kind will go down smoothly when it is poured out from one of our MYFO Beer Steins*.

 Beer Stein

* also awarded to Second Place in MYFO’s NCAA Hockey Tournament

Do you like coffee? Need yet another open container to store your urine? Well, look no further! Get yourself a couple of dozen MYFO Coffee Mugs*!

Coffee Mug 

*also awarded to Third Place in MYFO’s NCAA Hockey Tournament

Like wearing clothes? Need a new jizzrag? Stuff this MYFO t-shirt* under your mattress and it will be ready when you’re ready!


* also awarded to Fourth Place in MYFO’s NCAA Hockey Tournament

And last but not least, are you getting tired of wearing the same old shit to church? Impress your priest even more than the time when you didn’t tell anyone what he tried to stick in you in MYFO‘s Hockey Jesus Hooded Sweatshirt! In two sexy colors.

 White Hoodie

Black Hoodie

Now, before you start entering in your credit card and Social Security numbers in the comments section, you should know these are just prototypes. We are in the process of setting up shop at a fine online retailer.  When we are officially up and running, we will let you know. 

Please let us know in the comments any other sorts of items you would like us to sell with MYFO logo emblazoned on it. You know, to match the tattoo on your ass.



  1. * MYFO beer stein may also be used to drink Kool-Aid, for our underage readers.

    In addition, when ordering a Kool-Aid Stein, please indicate the age of consent in your home state/province.

  2. Also, the burglar above appears to be holding both a Fleshlight and a bag of “VAG”

  3. Ohhhh yeah!!

  4. Fleshlight? I love that Neil Diamond song!

    Turn on your Fleshlight, let it shine wherever you go

  5. Residuals, bitches! I’ll take my payment in Oreo cookies and Steel Reserve, thank you very much.

  6. No shot glasses?

  7. I love the stein, like a lot! And with my recent birthday (St Patty’s weekend) I can finally drink everywhere!

    Question for the Fleshlight people: How does one, you know, clean it out? That would be a concern of mine if I were male. Lenoceur, I love the phrase “bag of vag”, but I don’t know how to work it into my everyday speech

  8. @ Loser Domi: I’ve “heard” from “friends” that the Fleshlight has a cap that unscrews from the, um, non-insertive end. Said cap functions for cleaning purposes and also to regulate the, uh, suction. So I’ve heard.

  9. Lucy Pinder Maxim cover: NAFW. Weird what a “Hockey Jesus” search turns up (something about the owner of Maxim murdering someone.)

  10. Edit: Hockey Jesus search led to a WWTDD visit, which led to said Maxim cover. Slow day at the office.

  11. @Domi: The Fleshlight site happens to have a cleaning tutorial.

  12. wraparoundcurl and I had a great idea for a “More Ovie-time!!” shirt (i think she has the photoshop, but I dunno for sure) I just believe in equal time, is all–if there’s HOckey Jesus, then OVIE TIME!! should be represented, right?

  13. @ Domi: That is in the works. I made a mock up version of the hockey jesus hoodie that RD is taking care of. Also, an Avery shirt as well. Good things come in threes or something.

  14. I’d buy the whole line. The beer stein is off the proverbial chain.

    White hoodies are for womens softball teams and pride parades……..
    Definitely going with the black.

  15. I would proudly rock an OVIE-TIME hoodie!

  16. I’d probably buy this shit under the right circumstances.

  17. Hoodies would be a ton better if the website URL was, you know, smaller than the actual logo, or even better, not there at all.

  18. I got a “Jesus Saves, Satan Scores” shirt from that I wear all the time.

    For you Rags fans, they also have a Henrik Lundqvist shirt on the ebay link that says “Long Live the King”

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