Hey Peter Forsberg, Why Don’t You Go Ahead And Go Back To Sweden? No One Here Wants You Around Anymore

Last night, Big Floppa received a double minor for high-sticking when he smashed his stick into Mikael Samuelsson’s grill, knocking out a tooth of the Detroit winger. Here’s the play.

Certainly not a terribly reckless act by Forsberg, but it was worthy of a penalty being called. The infuriating aspect is what Big Floppa said after the game regarding the incident.

From the Associated Press recap:

“I didn’t realize I hit him. But I guess he was bleeding so I guess I did hit him, so I have nothing to say. If he’s bleeding, it’s four minutes. I didn’t think I hit him that hard.”

Seriously? He claims he didn’t realize he hit Samuelsson? He was looking directly at him! It doesn’t say anywhere whether he is married or not but I can picture Forsberg saying this to the police after he slaps around his wife. “Well, things got a little heated and she was coming at me and I was sort-of defending myself. I didn’t think I hit her that hard, but since half her face is caved in and her eye is swollen shut, I guess I did get her pretty good.”

Asshat.

Forsberg, not willing to let it end with that, accused Samuelsson of selling the call:

“Definitely. He’s laying there on the ice and I barely touched him.”

I watched the video a couple of times and it appears to me that all Samuelsson did was react to a stick hitting him squarely in the face and go down, presumably to look for his missing tooth.

Go home, Forsberg. Anything remaining of the good reputation you once had has been eradicated by your bullshit antics that ultimately led to you signing with the Avs. “I’ll hint that I’ll be coming back. Then I’ll let every team in the league salivate over the possibility of me signing with them. Then I’ll tell my agent to inform everyone I’m not returning, but then maybe I’ll be coy about it and then I’ll finally return and everyone will be grateful to marvel at my ability once again.”

Fuck that noise, Big Floppa. The shit doesn’t work around here. Ask Favre. We’ve grown exhausted with his act as well.

And one more thing, Forsberg: fuck you.

Fuck you for how you play the game. You take cheap shots at players and claim to play a rough and tumble style but if someone so much as skates too close you fall and flop down on the ice as if someone just took you out with a sniper rifle.

Fuck you for being such a distraction leading up to the trade deadline. A lot of teams wasted their time on you when they should have been looking for other ways to improve their squad.

And most of all, fuck you, Forsberg, for making me root for the goddamn Red Wings.

Go back to Sweden where people still adore you. We don’t want to deal with your shit anymore.

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9 Comments

  1. The post game comments by Floppa are especially hilarious in light of the Oscar-worthy performance of his during the 3rd period, where he was streaking toward the net and was “tripped” by the stick of (I believe) Fillpula. He turned around and was positively ASTOUNDED that he was not awarded a penalty shot or, at worst, a minor penalty. Unfortunately for the Avs, the play was still going on with the puck down low in the Wings zone and there could have been a legitimate scoring chance had he not been doing the “Timmy Duncan face” to Koharski…

  2. It’s true, Forsberg makes me sorta cheer for the Red Wings as well. What kind of fucked universe is this?

  3. You obviously were watching a different game than me when Forsberg got tripped. It wasn’t a stick that got him, the Detroit player actually grabbed his leg. Most absurd non-call I have seen in an important part of a playoff game in a long time.

  4. more than just having to root for the wings, which sucks, but having to hate a Swede. I’m usually a big fan of Sweden and most of her sons. Who am I supposed to like now? The fucking Finns?!

  5. Also, no Swedish chef jokes?

  6. bork bork floppas a douchebag bork bork?

    Great post, Weed against Speed. At least you’re not bitter about floppa teasing the wild, or beating them. (neither am I, he’s just a douchebag, I swear)

  7. @ rjsplow: I agree with JPB. I was at that game and was in that end when Forsberg was TACKLED, not tripped. That was just the icing on the cake as far as terrible non-calls went in that game for the Avs. On the other side, Detroit was flopping around like fucking Baggio out there and getting every ridiculous call (I don’t mean the double minor, that was correct). I’ve seen better acting in a porno with a $50 budget.

    /unbiased Bruins fan

  8. JPB and MadmanMundt ..you’re both cocksuckers. Fucking Forsberg shouldn’t have even BEEN in the game at that point…that fucking asshole. Are you kidding me? He took TWO swipes at Samuelsson’s face… missed on the first, and tried again. God DAMN! That’s a fucking game misconduct. Totally intentional, that fucking asshole. He’s a mother fucker. Piece of fucking shit. And so are you for mentioning a stupid fucking “noncall” that shouldn’t have even happened, as Forsberg should’ve been in the showers – or wherever it is that that pussy goes after a game. And, get this, I’m an AVS fan!

  9. Yup. These are our readers.

    /DouchebagSimmons


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