After every Columbus goal, the cannon fires Brittanie Cecil’s ashes.
1. A team improved by trading for available talent? GET OUT!!!!
2. Manny Malhotra’s name describes what he is: a bad hotra.
4. Raffi Torres is one of many Mexican immigrants traded by Mike Milbury for 5000 yards of fencing along the Rio Grande.
5. Remember this logo? Blue Jackets is a nickname for Union soldiers. I don’t remember Eddie Izzard’s friends fighting for Lincoln.
Possible MYFO Posts this Year
1. Ken Hitchcock is fat? GET OUT!!!
2. Ole-Kristian Tollefsen’s success in the biathlon.
3. R.J. Umberger only plays the Blackhawks 6 times this year. HOLY MACKEREL!
Prediction: Fuck it, Columbus is sneaking into the Western Conference Playoffs. Yes, I have been drinking, but that goes without saying for my posts. Huselius, Umberger, and Commodore’s signings, another year under Leclaire’s belt, and Rick Nash equals enough to earn the eighth seed. It’s a good thing that most of Columbus is Christian as they’ll be eaten by the top-seeded lions.
Song Exemplifying the Blue Jackets 2008-2009 Season: “Gold Heart Mountaintop Queen Directory” by …And You Will Know Us by the Trail of Dead
A majestic version of the Guided by Voices classic. Unlike the original track, whose charm is partly based on the crackling hiss of the four-track recording device, the Trail of Dead cover is polished up to give a sense of grandeur that seems slightly out of place. Similarly, the Blue Jackets’ signings and dealings this offseason (Huselius, Umberger, Commodore, Fedor Tyutin, Christian Backman) demonstrated attempted improvement over last year’s team, but these deals won’t be enough to win the Stanley Cup.