Another Boring Glenn Anderson Monologue

Mike: Alright, honey. Let’s try this again. None of those nosey assholes are anywhere near the house.

Willa: Well, OK.

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Making Puck: The Last Hurrah

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Well, this is it. I promised I wouldn’t cry, dammit.

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Making Puck: National Lampoon’s Christmas Edition

Thanks to reader Wufpirate for this idea. Today’s Making Puck pays tribute to one of my favorite Christmas movies, National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation. So, after the jump, join Clark, Ellen, Aunt Bethany and the rest as we light up the house, and lose the turkey.

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Making Puck: The Beautiful Edition

The Most Beautiful Woman Ever

Earlier this week, Reasonable Doubt brought you a very spicy photo of Christina Aguilera, a hot young lass indeed. Today, MYFO features Grace Kelly, the epitome of old skool beauty, class, charm and, well, grace. In short, you aren’t good enough to be with Grace Kelly. Never mind that she’s been dead for about 30 years. You’ve still got no shot. What else was beautiful last night? Continue reading

Making Puck: Unknown Pleasures

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Note: All links go to video highlights.

Disorder: Joe Thornton is the guide I’d like to take me by the hand.

Day of the Lords: Rick Nash is the cause of Colorado’s bloodsport and pain.

Candidate: We’re living by your rules, Roberto Luongo. That’s all that we know.

Insight: And all God’s angels, beware. The New Jersey Devils are hot.

New Dawn Fades: Florida’s change of speed, style, and scene with Craig Anderson replacing Tomas Vokoun in net leads only to an angry voice and one who cried.

She’s Lost Control: Rick DiPietro’s confusion in his eyes about the shootout rules shows it all.

Shadowplay: I could only stare in disbelief when Todd Bertuzzi scored.

Wilderness: Sidney Crosby saw the Edmonton fans’ tears in their eyes.

Interzone: Niklas Backstrom was busy looking for a friend of his and let in a neutral zone shot from Braydon Coburn.

I Remember Nothing: Radim Vrbata and I were strangers for way too long when he was in Chicago.

Making Puck: Yesteryear Edition

old-books.jpgIt was July 2007 when…the Dow Jones climbed over 14k for the first time…smoking  fags in public is banned in England…Melt Your Face-Off debuted…and LeNoceur introduced us to Lee Stempniak.  Ok, it was clearly off-season filler time when we first reported about Stempniak and his arbitration avoidance, a guy none of us had ever heard of.  But it appears that it has paid off, as his 1st period goal was the lone bright spot in a 3-1 loss to Calgary.  Ok, I admit, it’s dumb to reference a middling event as important history when it’s more recent than history, but if Dan Shanoff can make a living off of proclaiming instant classic, I should by all means get a bye on this one.

It was December 2003 when…the orca from Free Willy croaked…George Clinton gets busted for pot (again)…Michigan State and Kentucky played hoops at Ford Field…defenseman Wade Belak last scored a goal.  Well, it’s about damn time, Wade.  Look, I know that you’re a sparingly-used defenseman/enforcer rogue hybrid, and you’ve been busy bouncing around the league for awhile, but is it that hard to score goals?  Your goal helped propel Toronto to a 3-1 win over Nashville last night.  Hell, I remember back when you were an AHL pugilist, fighting the likes of Frank “The Animal” Bialowas.  Keep up the good work, El Wade.

It was March 1996 when…the Menendez brothers got the book thrown at them…Kasparov smokes Deep Blue in dork chess…Nash Bridges debuts and revolutionizes television everywhere?…oh, and the Ottawa Senators lost 7 straight.  Well, they’ve finally done it again, earning their seventh straight defeat at the hands of the feisty Tampa Bay Lightning.  Tampa jumped out to an early lead on goals from Darche and Chris Gratton (I still hate you), but two Sens’ goals in the final two minutes tied it at 3.  Overtime was boring (as usual), and Vinny “ONLY My Mother Can Call Me Vaclav” Prospal got the shootout gamewinner. 

It was February 1984 when…the Marines pulled out of Beirut…The Police played their final concert together for decades…Amadeus won best picture…and Chris Chelios began his career with the Montreal Canadiens.  Chelios returned home last night to Montreal, alongside a balanced Detroit attack as the Red Wings prevailed 4-1.  To honor Chelios’ likely final game in the city where it all started, Pavel Datsyuk scored two goals, one of which went through the legs of both a defenseman and goalie Carey Price – the rarely-seen 10-hole shot. 

Oh, did I mention that Hextall454 was 4 years old when Chris Chelios started with the Habs?  That’s insane.

Making Puck: Dumb & Dumber Edition

Dumb & Dumber

Top of the mornin’ to ya, puckheads. Your Making Puck this morning pays tribute to one of the finest pieces of American cinema ever to be caught on celluoid. It is a film that rivals Citizen Kane in its brilliance, depth and beauty. A little motion picture called…Dumb & Dumber.

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