The Commissioner’s Challenge: McDonald’s

mcd_1.gifThe Commissioner crinkles his nose, just so, which Driver dutifully notes in the mirror. It is the prearranged signal for McDonald’s coffee. As the town car glides smoothly into the Drive-Thru, the Commissioner’s Blackberry begins to buzz. Incoming call. The Caller ID reads, simply, “Noodles.”

“Noodles. You’re up early. That can only mean trouble.”
“Did you watch the Philly game last night?”
“Is that a rhetorical question?”
“Right. Anyway, during the game, Briere went absolutely batshit.”
“Noodles, you know how I hate vulgar language.”
“Sorry, boss. Anyway, he clipped like three guys with his stick before the linesmen could tackle him. On his way to the dressing room, he pulled off a skate and slashed the stick boy pretty good. Twenty-nine stitches.”
“So you’re going to suspend him, right? Like the rest of those Philly goons?”
“It’s not that easy. First, Briere isn’t a goon. He’s a star. Second, his agent is all over my ass, telling me that Danny was just really upset because some friend of his sister’s wouldn’t respond to his text message. I told his agent to call you. This is just a heads-up.”

The Commissioner hung up. Almost immediately, the phone buzzed again. The Caller ID showed an LA area code.

“This is the Commissioner.”
“Commissioner Bettman, it’s Pat Brisson. I’m Danny Briere’s agent.”
“I was expecting your call.”
“Listen. He’s a good kid. He was just a little emotional last night, that’s all.”
“When it gets to the level of cutting, it’s not just a normal emotional reaction, Pat. I think he needs some time off to get some help.”
“C’mon. How about a week? He’ll see a shrink and everything.”
“I don’t think so. I cannot abide unbridled violence. Young Daniel should be made an example of.”
“Don’t do it. You don’t understand what he’s capable of. He knows people. Bad people.”

Does the Commissioner suspend Briere for 30 games, or 3 games?

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